Tuesday, January 30, 2007



How was everyone's Christmas? On a scale from 1 to 10 how does it feel to be back in school or back at work? That's what I thought. Well, Erin and I had a great time relaxing in Grants Pass, Oregon with her family and friends. The weather was nice and we did a lot of nothing. We ate healthy and unhealthy food, watched movies, went to cafés, and played lots of games. I received a poker set for Christmas along with lots of books and The Office Season Two and Seinfeld Season Seven. Good times, not that it is about accumulating more stuff or anything. Above are pictures I took of a rusty door I saw with the word "apathy" written on it. The two ladies above are Suzannah, my sister-in-law and her friend Whitney. Good people. Lately I have been thinking about how apathy is something I can relate to. A lot of times I let the listlessness sink in and I act like Meursault in Camus' The Outsider, who is continually unconcerned and uncaring. Nothing is a serious matter to him, he has no ambition, nothing means anything to him. Camus says that Meursault's downfall is that he refuses to lie and to play the social game, this is how he feels (if you can call unfeeling a feeling) and therefore he is truthful. Question: Do you ever feel like you don't care anymore...about your goals, work, the things you shouldn't do, school, the things you should do? That's what I thought. You could always baptize me in a small blue basin of cold water ("I am a little concerned about your salvation and stuff..."). The answer, I have come to realize, is not necessarily movies like Blood Diamond (which is so good by the way) or reading International Development Magazine or talking to you friends about all your goals that you won't follow through on ("This year I won't shop at Wal-Mart" "This year I am going to tithe better" "This year I am going to the gym"). Whatever. The answer is prayer. Meeting with God. The question is: “Are you still sleeping and resting…?” (Mark 14:41).

1 comment:

Stacey Sparshu Miller said...

Oh Nathan...the little blue basin...'cause I'm a little concerned about your salvation and stuff...I still laugh out loud...thanks :0

And I totally hear you about apathy. Right now that's where I'm at. Yes, it's confession time. I just don't care about so much of my day to day...I keep asking "what's the point?" or "how is this really impacting the kingdom?" I don't want to just "fill" time. There are so many things that need to be done that I do see as important and yet here I am spinning my wheels in this "stuff." What's that all about!?